Life on Earth, Away from Gaea
by Killua K
Summary: New Cpater*uploaded*Hitomi breaks up with Allen because of personal problems. Then, she just realizes, Van was silently waiting for her-but he was engaged to Millerna. What will happen now-now that everything is so complicated between Hitomi and him?
1. Default Chapter

Note: It's my first time, OK? So juz read this and hope you'll like it! Please review!!!  
  
Life on Earth, Away from Gaea  
  
Chapter 1: Mistaken feeling  
  
*Remember, these people are not my true characters! I just borrowed them from. Watsuki Nobuhiro ^__^  
  
The moon was shining brightly and its light beamed down on her face. Traces of tears were very distinct as she tried to hide it. The feeling was so strong and she couldn't say a word about it. Will she mock him? Or will she just sit in one corner and weep? Different questions shook her mind and madder her dilemma more complicated. But only one thing that she knew, she's falling in love.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The doorbell rang many times. But no one answered. It was dawn and he came so early to see her. He's really excited for that day. He brought chocolates and a bouquet of roses just for her. He knew she'll like them. He was dressed neatly in that black tuxedo and with a touch of blue ice mint-flavored perfume-she'll enjoy every moment with him. His scent filled the air and scattered everywhere. It was just like magic that because of it, the sun rose beautifully and the nature blossomed to the fullest.  
  
'What's taking her so long?'  
  
His sweet smile started to frown as anxiety jabbed his head. She wasn't like that before. Everytime he would push the doorbell, she'd come and open the door with the damn perfect smile on her tame face. But what happened now?  
  
Flashback:  
  
"I'm sorry," he apologized as he accidentally hit her. His books fell and he began to worry. It was past twelve and he hasn't delivered the encyclopedias to the class. He looked above as he picked the last book and was surprised at the young lady leaning on to him. He smiled gently and his hesitation faded away. The girl grinned widely and stared at him for a moment.  
  
"I ask for your forgiveness. I wasn't looking. By the way, I'm Hitomi. If you need anything, just look for me at the next building," she said. The lady turned back and started to walk away. He couldn't erase the sweet words she spoke. And even her pretty name-Hitomi.  
  
Weeks passed and they built a strong bond between themselves; until the time came when their hearts spoke what they felt for each other. It was paradise when they both told each other what they truly felt. 'I love you.' He knew she'd tell those words forever and only to him. But when the moment comes that she'd find another man that'll love her, maybe she'd also tell those 3 words to that man-that's the time he'll be selfish. She's his and no one will possess her other than him.  
  
Their relationship was strong and he thought no one can ever destroy it. But fear melted his heart every time he thinks that someone will take his love away from him. It was her birthday and he planned to take her out. With five hundred bucks and a new convertible, he went to her apartment and fetched her there. The doorbell rang and surprisingly, it quickly opened. She stood there-perfect as ever. Her hair was neatly brushed and fixed nicely. The blue gown that he bought for her fit her magnificently. Her perfect-curved body shaped as she walked down the doorsteps with the long dress. She was very simple. But her simplicity made her glow. She looked perfect and gorgeous. Her sweet scent filled the air and lingered in the man's nose. She came closer to him and wrapped one arm around his broad waist. She looked at him and smiled. "Let's go, my Allen," she told him. Her words were very true. He's hers and only hers. No one will take them away from each other. They went inside the red polished convertible and drove to their destination.  
  
End of Flashback:  
  
Soon, the door opened and she came out, sleepy. Her hair was rumpled and she still wore her nightshirt. He looked at her, head to her feet. He suddenly noticed that she still wore the bunny slippers that he gave her. He grinned widely and realized that she still loved him. But why was she still in her nightshirt? Didn't she know that that day was special for them? Maybe she forgot. But she couldn't forgetr. He came inside and closed the door behind. Her apartment was nicely fied. There were flowers everywhere and the lounge was nicely arranged too.  
  
They went inside her room and sat on the bed. She opened the curtain and looked outside. The sun had risen but it was still dark. She turned her head and looked at the clock. It was quarter to seven. It was Saturday and there was no work. She's free and that's all she wanted. She wanted to rest the whole day in her house.  
  
"Allen, were you promoted as the president of your company?" Hitomi asked.  
  
He nodded his head and smiled.  
  
"But I'm not here for that. I'm here because it's our anni---," he paused asHitomi held his face nad and slightly kissed him on his lips. He looked at her surprisingly. 'She wasn't like that before.'  
  
"It's our anniversary, I know. But, can we just stay here?" she p-leaded. He thought for a while. Then-  
  
"No, I can't let you celebrate our anniversary in your apartment. I want you to celebrate it with me- in a class restaurant. I'll take you anywhere you want, Hitomi," he said.  
  
She lowered her head and kept quiet for a while. The she lifted her head and smiled at him.  
  
"Okay, my love. If that's what you want. . ."  
  
~*~*~*  
  
He looked at her as she took one spoondful of rice. She ate quietly but as gentle as ever. Her eyes were sparkling as she looked at the food in front of her and her sweet aroma filled the air and scattered.  
  
" Hitomi,  
  
do. . .  
  
you. . .  
  
love. . .  
  
me?" he began to ask.  
  
Suddenly, she accidentally dropped her spoon and trembled a bit. It seemed that she doubted his words-or, her own if she'd answer that question. She just lowered her head and ignored him. 'Maybe, if I'll change the topic, he'd ignore that question.' She lifted her head and smiled sweetly.  
  
"So, how's business?" she began to ask.  
  
He reached out his hand and held hers. He began to frown-something he only does when he's worried. She looked down on his hand and felt that he was tightening it.  
  
"Hitomi, is there someone else?" he questioned her. She ignored him and slowly slipped her hand away from him. She wasn't able to look at him directly for she knew, he'd gonna ask a question again.  
  
"Hitomi-please. Don't hide it from me. I know there's someone, isn't it?" he asked. Suddenly she rose from her seat and looked at him. She was smiling- it seemed that she didn't hear anything.  
  
"I'll just attend to my personal needs," she said as she started to walk away from him. Tears formed in her eyes and blurred her vision. Suddenly, she bumped into something. She wiped her tears and cleared her vision. The manly form leaned on her and held her near his chest. She looked above and saw a young man looking down on her and holding her arm.  
  
"Sorry, ma dame," he spoke tenderly. He helped her stood up. He bent his back and picked up the broken glass on the floor. Hitomi was surprised at what she has done. She bumped him. And that was the reason the glasses broke. She didn't mean it but she can't change the fact that she might be the reason he'd get fired from his job.  
  
"No-it's ok. Actually, it's all my fault," she apologized.  
  
The man stood up with the broken glasses on the tray. He had dark blue eyes that shone brightly. He smiled sweetly. " It's all right, ma dame," he said.  
  
Hitomi smiled too. But Allen came and saw them talking to each other. He stood behind her and held her arm.  
  
"Who's this waiter, Hitomi? An old friend?" he asked abruptly. The man lowered his head and felt ashamed of himself. He looked at him again.  
  
"What's your order, sir?" he asked then.  
  
Allen hit the tray intentionally and broke the pieces of glass. He laughed a bit and pushed him.  
  
"I don't care if you don't seem to understand what I'm saying. I just want you to stay away from my girl, okay?!" he said. The man nodded his head and quickly went back to work. Hitomi watched him as he went inside the lounge and sat for a while. She turned to Allen and was disappointed at what he did.  
  
"Why did you do that?" she calmly asked. Suddenly, he kissed her lips and held her face. But she quickly turned her head away from him. She noticed that the waiter was secretly watching them. His eyes were lowered and his pinkish lips were curved downwards. She felt sorry for him. She was really the reason. She shouldn't have bumped him.  
  
"Do you love me? I just need one answer, Hitomi. Yes or no?" Allen pleaded. She looked at him and tried to speak.  
  
"Well-. . . maybe" she replied.  
  
He was disappointed at her answer. His heart broke. He knew she was still his-but why was she getting colder everyday? It seemed that they have no relationship. He half-smiled and lowered his head.  
  
"Okay. Then-I love you, too," he sadly said.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
After the date, he went back to his house. He entered it threw himself on the chair. He sat on it and leaned his back on the seat. He looked at the sky and imagined her face. He couldn't believe that all this time, she wasn't sure of her love for him.  
  
Maybe, she's sick. He would always say that to himself. But she wasn't sick that time. And that look on her face troubled him so much. As long as she's with him, everything will be fine. But what if it won't?  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"Where's room 488?" the man asked. He was tall and his dark blue eyes sparkled as he spoke. The old lady got a small key from the slot and handed it to him. And with a smile, the young man entered the elevator and went upstairs.  
  
To be continued. . .  
  
Author: Well, I've finished one chapter!! Just wait for the next. I'm really tired of typing here. Well, I hope you'll like it. PLEASE REVIEW OKAY???? Thank you!!!^__^ 


	2. Roommates and Foes?

Life on Earth, Away from Gaea  
  
Note: Well, thank you for waiting for the next chapter of my story. I'm very grateful for all those people who have read it and have loved it. Again, I'm asking you to please review because it will help me a lot to improve my story! ^__^  
  
Chapter 2: Roommates . . . and Foes?  
  
The elevator door opened and he stepped outside. He slowly paced towards his room and held the knob. 'I hope I'll be fine.' He turned the knob and pushed the door as he went in. The door suddenly closed and footsteps echoed in the room. He breathed hard and convinced himself that there's nothing to worry. But as the sound grew, he began to feel frightened. He felt his feet moved back as the sensation came closer. Suddenly, he closed his eyes and felt the presence in his room.  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
The voice asked. He slightly opened his eyes and saw a girl with white head band tied around her hair. She had short hair and she looked sweet. Her brown eyes shone as she stared him. He suddenly felt safe. He foolishly thought there was a ghost-but of course, there wasn't, just a girl. 'Stupid!' he thought.  
  
"I'm Van Vener?," he replied. (Remember: I just used another last name for Van because he didn't want anyone to know his true identity.)  
  
The girl raised her eyebrow and came closer to him.  
  
"What are you *doing* here?" she asked. Van put down his luggage and stood straight.  
  
"This is my apartment and I'm going to live in here. Shouldn't *I* be the one to ask you that stupid question?" he said sarcastically. The woman came closer to him and frowned disgustingly.  
  
"How dare you say that?!" she cried. "I paid for this room. This is *my* apartment. Maybe you're lost."  
  
Van was shocked at what she said. Anger shook his head and jabbed his spine.  
  
"What the hell are you saying?! This is room 488, right?" he spoke. The girl nodded her head. Then she lifted her hand and scratched it confusingly. She thought for a while.  
  
"But, Mr. . ." she paused and tried to guess his name.  
  
"Van. . .Van Vener?. Well, maybe I should know your name too," he told her.  
  
"Hitomi. . .Well, as I was saying, Mr. Van, I was the first who entered this room and paid for it. The old lady downstairs told me that I have no roommate. So-how could that happen?" her voice rose to a higher tone.  
  
Suddenly, Van laughed slyly. He laughed loudly and sarcastically that the girl's cheeks turned crimson in furiousness.  
  
"Maybe you haven't paid her for a year! Damn!!! Hahahaha!!! Geez, I never thought of that stupid reason. Oh goodness!" he shouted. Suddenly, the girl came closer and slapped him. Her hand left a deep red mark on his face. He was shocked at what she did. He held his face and felt the pain melting his cheeks. He removed his hand and looked at it. Blood stained his palm and fingers.  
  
'Is she that strong? Or have I teased her so badly?'  
  
He got a hanky from his pocket and wiped his wound. Blood was rushing down on his face. He looked at the girl and noticed that she was shocked at what she has done. Suddenly, she lowered her head and clenched her fists.  
  
"I. . .I-will ask the lady the true-r-reason. And I'll prove to you that I'm right!" she cried as she went out of the room and headed to the old lady.  
  
Van wiped the blood completely and went to his own room. He arranged his luggage and put his clothes in the wardrobe-half-covering the big window. He sat on his medium-sized bed and reposed for a while. He sighed deeply and scratched his head.  
  
"My oh my! I never thought I'd be a roommate of an-of an arrogant fool like her. Hmm. . ." he cried.  
  
Suddenly, something cracked behind him. He looked back and saw a broken picture frame. He examined it and a noticed the familiar face.  
  
"This was the-this was the . . . girl in the restaurant!" he exclaimed. She was smiling in the picture but her eyes spoke that she wasn't happy.  
  
Flashback:  
  
"Sorry, ma dame," he spoke tenderly. He helped her as she stood up. He bent his back and picked up the broken glass on the floor. The woman was surprised at what she did. She bumped him. And that was the reason he might get fired.  
  
"No-it's okay. Actually, it's my fault," she apologized. The man stood up with the broken glass on his tray. His dark blue eyes shone brightly as he smiled sweetly.  
  
End of FB:  
  
He put the picture frame inside the drawer and sighed again. "I heard him say, 'Hitomi'," he said as he crossed his arms behind his head. He was half- smirking.  
  
Suddenly, he heard the door opened. He quickly stood up and went outside to check if she were already there.  
  
"Mr. Vener?, I'm sorry. I'm very wrong. I found out that I really have a roommate. Sorry, well-you'll sleep there," she pointed to a room. "And you can use anything you want. . . except for *my* personal needs," the girl said sternly. She sat on a chair and put on socks. She wore a lose blue t- shirt and denim shorts.  
  
"Okay. Well-I'll go now. I'll have work to do," he said. He put on his shoes and opened the door. He once looked back and saw the lady fixing her socks. The door opened and he left.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"Who told you I don't love you?" she asked him.  
  
He raised his eyebrows and pushed her to the wall. He trapped her between his arms and stared at her.  
  
"Hitomi, is there a third party? Is there someone else? Tell me!" he cried. Tears flowed out of Hitomi's eyes. She covered her mouth and stopped herself from moaning. She shook her head and didn't look at him. "Allen, if you want to keep this relationship. . .  
  
just. . .  
  
have. . .  
  
trust. . .  
  
in. . .  
  
me. . ."she spoke slowly.  
  
She removed his arm and stared at him back once more. He was stupefied at what he heard from her mouth. His eyes were widened and no one could interpret his mixed feelings.  
  
She paced slowly and tried to get away from him. But her feet were so heavy. She couldn't lift them nor move them. Suddenly, Allen pulled her towards him and kissed her as he hugged her tightly. Tears rushed down on their faces as they tasted each other's breath. Sadness and anger were between them. And un fortunately, it's not- love.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The woman lowered her head and yawned a bit. She was half-sleepy and her eyes were lowered. Suddenly, another girl came and went to her.  
  
"Millerna, he's waiting," the girl spoke.  
  
"Arigato, Ucari. I'll just go to his office," she said. The girl stood up and entered the room.  
  
  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Reflection By: Christina Aguilera  
  
Look at me  
  
I will never pass  
  
For a perfect bride  
  
Or a perfect daughter  
  
Can it be  
  
I'm not meant to play this part  
  
Now I see  
  
And if I were truly to be myself  
  
I would break my family's heart  
  
*who is that girl I see  
  
Staring straight back at me  
  
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?  
  
Somehow I cannot hide who I am  
  
Though I've tried  
  
When will my reflection show  
  
Who I am inside?  
  
I am now  
  
In a world where I have to hide myself  
  
And what I believe in  
  
But somehow  
  
I can't show the world what's inside my heart  
  
And to love for whom I am  
  
*who is that girl I see  
  
staring straight back at me  
  
why is my reflection someone I don't know  
  
somehow I cannot hide who I am  
  
though I've tried  
  
when will my reflection show who I am inside  
  
there's a heart that must be free inside  
  
that burns with a need to know  
  
the reason why  
  
why must we all concede  
  
what we feel  
  
how it feels  
  
when will my reflection show who I am inside  
  
When will my reflection show who I am inside. . . --- She lowered her head and wiped the tears that formed in her brown eyes.  
  
"I loved you for the past year. But- you didn't seem to understand my situation," she said. Her eyes shone brightly. But the tears kept on flowing.  
  
"Allen. . .do I still love you?" she asked herself sadly.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Van rested his head on the pillow. He crossed his legs and turned on the TV. 'Why is she so cold to him?'  
  
Flashback:  
  
The man nodded his head and quickly went back to work. Hitomi watched him as he went inside the lounge and sat for a while. She turned to Allen and was disappointed at what he did.  
  
"Why did you do that?" she calmly asked. Suddenly, he kissed her lips and held her face. But she quickly turned her head away from him. She noticed that the waiter was secretly watching them. His eyes were lowered and his pinkish lips were curved downwards. She felt sorry for him. She was really the reason. She shouldn't have bumped him.  
  
"Do you love me? I just need one answer, Hitomi. Yes or no?" Allen pleaded. She looked at him and tried to speak.  
  
"Well-. . . maybe" she replied.  
  
End of FB:  
  
Someone knocked on the door. Van got up and held the knob.  
  
"Who's this? Ms. Hitomi?" he spoke.  
  
"Y-y-yes!!!" the trembling voice answered. He wondered what happened. Suddenly, he opened the door.  
  
The girl rushed inside-crying. She threw herself carelessly on the sofa. He went to her and noticed that she was crying so hard. He sat beside her and comforted her.  
  
"It's all right. Whatever it is, it's just a very bad dream," he told her. Surprisingly, she pushed him aside.  
  
"Dream?!" she shouted. "You don't know what I'm in so you better shut up! I- I don't need anybody . . . anyone who would want to disturb me, okay?!" she cried as she threw a pillow to him. Tears kept on rolling on her cheeks. She was very angry at something-or worse, maybe with him. He stood up and looked at her. His face almost turned red.  
  
"Okay. I will shut my mouth. But stop acting like a foolish. . .arrogant- brat! You're not a kid anymore!" he exclaimed. "You know, I hate people like you. I was just trying to ease the pain that you're feeling. But what are you doing? You keep on neglecting it."  
  
"But I don't need your help!"  
  
"FINE! I won't help you. Who cares?! Huh-Hitomi?!" he cried. He walked towards his room and locked himself inside. He was very angry with her. 'I was just trying to help her. But why is she like that?' He didn't know what was happening. But he felt that there's something wrong going on. 'Hitomi, what's your problem?'  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Night came.  
  
They haven't talked to each other. She was in her room and he was in his own room. But it was really because of her. She tried to become strong but actually she was just so weak. She shouldn't have done that. He was kind and gentle but she still refused his kind deed. She was just as foolish as ever.  
  
'maybe he's right. Maybe I'm really a foolish.arrogant brat. No one would not accept a feeling of concern from him except-me.' She thought. Suddenly, the door opened as she looked back. He was standing there with a bouquet of flowers arranged nicely. He lifted his head and smiled.  
  
"I can't forgive myself for what I've done. I let a girl cry just because of me," he said. He came closer to her and gave the flowers. He grinned widely as his eyes shone.  
  
"Hitomi, I'm sorry," he said. Suddenly, she threw herself carelessly on his chest and cried hard.  
  
"I'm very sorry, Van. I. . .I'm so sorry," she cried as she hugged him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and comforted her.  
  
"It's all right. Everything's fine," he said happily.  
  
To be cont. . .  
  
Well, one chapter's finished! Again, please review!!!^__^ 


	3. Friendship

Life on earth away from gaea  
  
Chapter 3: Friendship  
  
Note: Pls. Review!!!  
  
"Mr. Fanell, the CEO of the company came and asked for your help."  
  
"Financial problems? Well just tell my secretary to handle this. She'll know what to do," he commanded. The messenger nodded his head and went away. Suddenly, he stood from his seat and imagined her face. Her eyes were lowered but she was smiling.  
  
'You'll understand somehow I know you will,' she said. It was what Hitomi told him that night. He asked her what was wrong but sadly, that was just her simple answer.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The phone rang. He came and turned on the speaker.  
  
"Hello, this is Schezar's residence, "he spoke as he sat on the upholstered chair. He drank a capsule and then a glass of water. Suddenly, someone answered.  
  
"Allen, this is Hitomi. I'm sorry,"  
  
she spoke.  
  
He quickly sat up straight and smiled.  
  
"It's alright Hitomi, I know you still love me. Am I right?" he said. Suddenly she wasn't able to speak. Tears formed in her eyes as she stopped herself from crying.  
  
"Hitomi? Hitomi are you still there?" Allen asked. She quickly wiped her tears and spoke.  
  
"Yeah, of course," she replied.  
  
"Well, let's just change the topic. By the way, what happened to Ms. Millerna? Will she be working in my company, too, just like Ucari?" he asked.  
  
"Yes, actually, I met Ucari yesterday. She told me that Millerna was a nice woman. She's smart and she can handle things easily," Hitomi said.  
  
Suddenly, she heard him crying in pain. He didn't hear her. He was attacked by his migraine again. She couldn't stand it longer. His voice echoed in her ears and also tortured her. It was too painful for her to hear his suffering. It was too much.  
  
"Nooooo!!!!! Hi. . .to .. .mi. . .,h-help me!!! AAAUUUGGGHHH!!!" he cried. Suddenly, the phone hung up. She held the receiver near her ear and was startled. She wasn't able to move. The phone quickly slipped from her hands and fell on the wooden floor. She trembled nervously and felt so frightened about it.  
  
'Allen,' she thought.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
He quietly sat on the chair and looked at the papers in front of him. Piles of documents surprised him when he came back. He didn't know he had been gone too long. His three big companies depended on him. But he's already tired of working. He wanted to live in a simple life, away from luxuries and away from wealth. But he shouldn't be away too long because his companies might lose their place in the market. And they would surely blame him for that.  
  
Flashback:  
  
"You're a FANELL for goodness's sake!!! How could you do this to us? You're going to leave us and our business just live in a simple life?!" the old man cried.  
  
To be continued.  
  
Chapter 3: Friendship  
  
Note: Sorry! It took me so many days before I've updated my story. . .But don't you worry. I'll write more! Plz. Review!!!  
  
Cont. . .  
  
Flashback:  
  
"You're a Fanell for goodness's sake! How could you do this to us? You're going to leave us just to live in a simpler life?" the old man cried. He threw his cane to him and was very angry with him. He pulled his grandson's shirt and threw him to the wall.  
  
"Your father is just like you! He's a stupid man! He fell in love with a woman when he left us. But what happened to him? When the woman got all she wanted from him, he came back to us-sorry for what he's done!" he cried madly. Suddenly, the door opened and his father came upon him.  
  
"Van, what happened?" he asked. He assisted him as he stood up. But with an angry look in his blue eyes, Van left him and didn't come back.  
  
End of Flashback:  
  
"I'm very sorry, grandpa. I should've followed you," he spoke.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The door opened and he came inside his apartment. He removed his necktie and put his suitcase on the floor. He sat on the sofa and put his legs on the side of the furniture. He sighed deeply and thought about his family again. Time came when he closed his tired eyes and took a catnap.  
  
FB:  
  
"I wish I'd be able to meet the lady I want to spend my life with," he spoke as he laid himself in his mother's arms. His mother wrapped her arms around him and caressed his body. She was so gentle.  
  
"You'll meet her someday. She'd be nearly perfect for you, my son. I know she'll deserve you," she said lovingly. He looked at her and smiled sweetly.  
  
"I wish she'd be like you, mom," he said. His mother chuckled and kissed him lightly on his forehead. Her sweet scent filled his nose and enveloped him.  
  
"You'll never know," she said tenderly. Suddenly, snow began to fall outside and covered the whole place. He slept in his mother's arms and wished forever.  
  
End of FB:  
  
"Van, someone's looking for you. Hey!"  
  
He opened his eyes and wiped his sleepiness away. He saw a woman dressed in a scarlet gown. She was damn gorgeous. She had a necklace similar to his mom's. he sat up and brushed his hair by his fingers.  
  
"You look gorgeous, Hitomi," he praised sweetly. The woman smiled at him as her brown eyes shone brightly. Her thin pink lips sparkled as it curved into a shy smile. She put her hands on her slim waist and posed.  
  
"Well, as I've said-someone's looking for you," she repeated. Suddenly, Van stood up and went closer to her. He lifted his big rough hand and brushed Hitomi's hair away from her face. Her heart beat fast and her cheeks blushed tremendously.  
  
'Why am I feeling this way? No! this is just a normal feeling of. . .'  
  
But of what? She stared at his eyes and kept on thinking about the right term to say. 'Friends. . .Yeah, friends,' she thought. She closed her eyes as sweat rolled on her face. Suddenly, he lightly kissed her on her rosy cheeks. She blushed more when she felt his lips against her skin-heating her from head to toe.  
  
"You're like a princess to me, Hitomi," he spoke.  
  
She smiled at the word.  
  
"By the way, where will you go?" he asked.  
  
She opened her eyes and grinned widely at him. She wasn't able to speak. She just smiled sweetly until she told him, "It's Allen's birthday. I'll be his-well, partner? Do you want to go with me? I know he'd be glad to know my new. . .friend."  
  
He grinned widely and nodded his head. Then he went outside to meet the person waiting for him.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
it was past one when he woke up. Sweat streamed down from his temples. He stood up and went to his bathroom.  
  
'Hitomi. . .' he thought as he washed his face. He looked at the mirror and saw the wound on his forehead. He tried to touch it and felt the blood rushed out.  
  
FB:  
  
"NOOO!!! Hi. . .to. . .mi. . ., h-h-h-elp me!!! AAUUGGHH!!!" he cried as he held his head. He was attacked by his illness again. It just hurt him so much. He felt his brain being split into two.  
  
The phone slipped from his hands and fell. He collapsed and hurt his forehead on the cemented floor. "Hitomi," he uttered as he lost his consciousness.  
  
He's always thinking of her-all the time. But he couldn't accept the fact that they weren't meant for each other. He might die and she'll find someone for herself. As everyday passed between them, he's getting more afraid.  
  
End of FB:  
  
"Gomen nasai," he said as he looked into his own eyes and realized the truth.  
  
Anyway, it was his birthday that day. There'll be a great party and she'd be his partner. That party was only meant for them. He loved her so much that he'd be willing to give up his own life. But the question is---  
  
'Would she be willing to give up her own life for him too?'  
  
  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"Uh-Millerna? Why are you here in Tokyo? I thought you were in New York?" Van exclaimed. Suddenly, the woman with gold hair hugged him tightly and was very pleased.  
  
"Van, I'm glad you're here!" she cried as she kissed his cheeks. He raised his eyebrow and frowned. But before he could say anything, she went inside the apartment and put her luggage on the floor. She looked around and saw that everything's nice.  
  
"Well, grandpas' right. You're really.ummm.I can't think of the word. But I'm sure you will be a very good roommate of mine," she praised him. He blushed and at the same time, was shocked at what she said.  
  
"Roommate-of y-yours?"  
  
She nodded her head then left him there to check the place. Van closed the door behind and grinned.  
  
He followed her dear woman as he chuckled lightly.  
  
  
  
When Van reached her, he held her arm softly. "Actually, I have a roommate, Millerna. Is it uh-okay for you?" he asked. Suddenly, she hugged him tightly. Her scent lingeredin his nose for a while.  
  
"That's okay, my Van," she replied as she flirted with him. Then she finally removed her arms around him and turned her head to someone.  
  
There was a woman-her eyebrows were raised and her hands were on her waist.  
  
"Hey, Van! Who's that woman flirting you?" Hitomi sarcastically said. Van looked at her and was so shocked to see her standing across the room. He quickly pushed Millerna aside and pretended that he didn't know anything.  
  
"Ummm.she's-"  
  
"I'm Millerna, Van's soon-to-be-wife," Millerna spoke.  
  
Hitomi narrowed her eyes and was irritated at her acts.  
  
"She's going to be our roommate. . .for a while, I think," he said as he smiled. Hitomi went closer and stared at his eyes. She felt a feeling disturbing her mind. She didn't know what it was. But she was sure she felt it before.  
  
FB:  
  
'They held hands. And what suppose do they think should I feel?' she thought.  
  
The woman's fingers ran up and down on his face then she kissed him- seducing. He put his arms around her neck and pulled her towards him.  
  
'Why are you doing this to me, Allen? I just told you I'm not ready yet but then, you haven't waited me. How could you do this to me?' she thought as she watched them before her eyes. He continued to kiss the woman he paid for a thousand bucks. In an instant, all her dreams were torn down.  
  
'I said I'm not ready. Why can't you understand that simple statement?' she asked herself. She knew he was drunk and he didn't know what he's been doing. But it's not that. One question was inserted in her baffled mind-was she still in love with him? She went away from him and tried to forget everything. But she couldn't erase the horrible scene. It was stuck in her mind. Maybe-it will last forever.  
  
  
  
The moon was shining brightly and its light beamed down on her face. Traces of tears were very distinct as she tried to hide it. The feeling was so strong and she couldn't say a word about it. Will she mock him? Or will she just sit in one corner and weep? Different questions shook her mind and madder her dilemma more complicated. But only one thing that she knew, she's falling in love.  
  
'Is his love?' she thought. 'Is this how to love? You have to give up everything just to make him happy? But I've given up so much for him. No- this isn't love. I'm just jealous and absolutely not in love.'  
  
End of FB:  
  
"Damn it," she spoke. His eyes widened when he heard her say that. His lips trembled a bit when he felt her breath damping his mouth.  
  
"Gomen, Hitomi. I was just joking," he chaffed. She stared at him directly. Her eyes burning in anger.  
  
"Damn it," she repeated. Suddenly, she held his face and kissed him on his lips. He was shocked at what she did. Her lips were so tasty and her breath lingered in his mouth. He didn't let her go but he also didn't know that Millerna was watching them. Suddenly, Hitomi pushed him aside and wiped her lips.  
  
"Gomen ne," she apologized. Tears flowed out of her eyes as she looked at him.  
  
'she didn't mean it. Her kiss was a fallacy,' he thought as he lowered his head. Hitomi ran away and left them. She didn't want o be humiliated.  
  
"Van, who is she?" Millerna asked as she went closer to him. He looked at her and smiled.  
  
"She is Hitomi. My. . .friend," he spoke. He went inside his bedroom and tried to forget what happened.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
7:30 p.m. Kunichiro Hotel  
  
The party started and they were there. Hitomi wore a long scarlet gown and she had a necklace that held a ruby which shimmered while she paced elegantly along the aisle of the decorated hall. Meanwhile, Van wore a simple black tuxedo. But, he looked damn gorgeous with it.  
  
They walked through the lobby and met other guests of Allen.  
  
Suddenly, an old woman approached them. "Hello," she spoke. Van noticed the British accent in her voice. He smiled at that. 'Cute', he thought stupidly. Hitomi gave her a sweet smile as she nodded her head slowly.  
  
"Are you Hitomi Kaizaki?(Is this her true surname? Well then if it is, what's the right spelling? Sorry!!)" the old woman asked gently.  
  
"Hai," Hitomi replied.  
  
"Well, Allen's waiting for you. Come and present yourself to him," she said.  
  
Hitomi held the lady's arm and looked back at Van. "Hey, let's go!" she gestured to him as she pulled him.  
  
"Uh.Allen said-waiters are not allowed here in the place. Because this is a place for. . .true civilized people of the place." Van's mouth dropped open.  
  
"B-b-but why?" he asked confusingly. The lady pulled Hitomi and led her to Van. She didn't pay attention to him instead she just left him. A man came and pulled his one arm.  
  
"Come here. You can watch them. But you should help in serving the other guests," he said. Van raised his eyebrow and stared at him.  
  
"Don't you know me, sir?" he asked sarcastically. The man chuckled.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. You're a waiter in a restaurant. Well come on. Sir Allen's waiting for you!" he spoke.  
  
Van followed him and had no other choice. 'Maybe this is just a big joke,' he thought. But nothing had ever happened.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
8:00 p.m. Dance Floor  
  
He finished his task quickly and did almost all the things a waiter does- well, not all.  
  
The ball started as the music played. People began to dance and follow the rhythm of the music. Lights filled the hall and many couples crowded the place. Van watched everyone as he sat in one dark corner.  
  
His fingers were trembling from the hard work he just did. He wasn't JUST a waiter. He was.MORE than that. He sometimes laughed at the idea that he worked in his own famous and elegant restaurant as a waiter. But this time, he was more than hilarious about it. This time-well this time was different. He realized that he needed to introduce himself as. . .the true Van. Not the screen name he used when he told Hitomi of himself. But, would it change what's happening? Would that Allen believe him? Of course not, for he was cruel. Allen was cold-hearted. He would laugh at him and just humiliate him. 'But.' Another 'but', if he would use his true name, would he be so comfortable in using it? His grandfather had neglected him as the member of the family and he would surely not let him use it. Well.  
  
He looked at Hitomi. She was sitting in front of a round table covered with a red silk tablecloth. She was beautiful. Her eyes were earth brown. They speak her well of her feelings. Her necklace. It was the one that almost looked like his mother's. He turned his head into another direction. He saw Allen Schezar. Allen. His name-it was so pleasant. Did Hitomi love him because of his name? If Van, himself, would tell her of his pleasant name, would she love him too?  
  
'Fool!' he shouted at himself. 'Millerna is there. You do not need Hitomi. She has Allen. And she is not for YOU.'  
  
He pulled his hair by his tired fingers. Does it have to do with the name for a woman to love a man? 'There's Millerna. . .' the thought screamed at him.  
  
He lifted his eyes to the hall and saw Allen as he asked for Hitomi's hand. She looked up at the blonde-haired man and smiled sweetly as she stood up. They paced to the dance floor and danced gracefully. They were the center figure of the party. But Van just sat there-lonely.  
  
Suddenly, the man came again and gave him a tray.  
  
"Serve the guests then.also clean the floor. The janitor's out today," he commanded sternly. Van got the tray and started serving the guests. He tried to glimpse at the couple dancing but the man was angry. Next, he cleaned the floor and mopped it. After a moment, he accidentally hit the pail of water. The pail fell and wet Allen.  
  
"What the hell are you doing?!" Allen cried as he removed his coat. Hitomi assisted him and the eyes of the people were glued on them.  
  
Allen pulled Van's shirt and stared at him but Van just looked at him gently.  
  
"Watch out, you stupid waiter! You've messed up with me before. Don't repeat that mistake with me. You don't know who's in front of you," he spoke. Van lowered his head as Allen removed his hand on his shirt. He felt humiliated. He immediately cleaned the floor and took the pail away. He sat again in the dark corner and kept quiet. He looked at Allen and Hitomi. They were very happy as they gracefully moved on the floor. While he, was doing jobs he shouldn't be doing. 'If they only know,' he thought as he looked at them. Suddenly, he saw Hitomi smiling. Her smile was really perfect.  
  
'Hitomi,' he mused. Then the music changed. He related himself much with the song itself.  
  
--  
  
Tears in Heaven by: Eric Clapton  
  
Would you know my name  
  
If I saw you in heaven  
  
Would it be the same  
  
If I saw you in heaven  
  
I must be strong  
  
And carry on  
  
'cause I know I don't belong  
  
here in heaven  
  
would you hold my hand  
  
if I saw you in heaven  
  
would you help me stand  
  
if I saw you in heaven  
  
I'll find my way  
  
Through night and day  
  
'cause I know I just can't saty  
  
here in heaven  
  
Time can bring you down  
  
Time can bring you near  
  
Time can break your heart  
  
Have you begging, "please"  
  
Begging, "please"  
  
Behind the door  
  
There's the peace I'm sure  
  
And I know there'll be no more  
  
Tears in heaven  
  
Would you know my name  
  
If I saw you in heaven  
  
Would you be the same  
  
If I saw you in heaven  
  
I must be strong  
  
And carry on  
  
'cause I know I don't belong  
  
here in heaven. . .  
  
--  
  
FB:  
  
"Mother, will a girl love me for who I am?" he asked.  
  
She nodded her head.  
  
"Someday you'll find her," she said.  
  
He looked at her solemnly. His eyes sparkled with joy.  
  
"Mother, how does. . .l-l-l-ove feel? Does it hurt?" he questioned her.  
  
She smiled at her son. "Yes, it can really wound your heart-very much. But it's really happy when you fall in love. You'd always think of her and woory for her. Well, loving is the greatest when you'll reach the point that you'd have to let her go and be happy just because you love her," she said as she kissed him on the forehead.  
  
End of FB:  
  
  
  
Note: AAAUUGGGHHH!!!!I'm finished! Thank you for patronizing my story and for appreciating it so much. Thank you for those people who review it always and for those who e-mail me!!!Again, plzzz.review!!!!^__^ 


	4. Cease of All Things

Note: Well, Shicsaaczzz-the-s2pid Psyche is back!!!I'm sorry because I haven't updated this story much. Well, thanks for all the reviews out there. But I'm somehow sad because I only got 8 reviews and I think it's not enough. Plzz.Plzz. Read And Review, guys!!! I'm down here on bended knees. Well, here's the deal. If you won't review my fic.  
  
No posting of chapters and etcetera.  
  
Well, on with the story!  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter 4: Cease of All Things  
  
~*~*~*  
  
11:45 p.m. Reception Hall  
  
Platters of desserts and main courses were lined up on the table. There were roasted chickens, braised beef, mouth-watering lasagnas, chicken pastels, grilled lobsters and many more.  
  
*I'm hungry.*  
  
The guests fell in line and each served themselves much like in a buffet style.  
  
"Mr. Schezar, thank you for the great party," the middle-aged man said. He grinned widely and went to his table to eat. Other guests did the same thing too. They came up to Allen, greeted happy birthday and thanked for the invitation to the party. Soon, almost all of the guests were out except for Hitomi, Van and other special friends of Allen.  
  
"I guess we have to go, Allen," Hitomi spoke. She kissed him lightly on his cheek and smiled. Allen held her hand suddenly and got out something from his pocket. He opened it and got out a diamond ring. His eyes glanced at the lady in front of her. 'The woman of my dreams.haven't I waited this long? I need her answer now. Now that everything is going more complicated. And I think, this is the best solution for the problems coming up on our way.'  
  
"Will you marry me, Hitomi?"  
  
Suddenly she removed her hand from his and frowned a bit. And he expected that kind of reaction from her. 'Would I have to wait? Again? But I've waited so long. Or this is just another obstacle that I have to face? Hitomi, why do you need to refuse me all the time? If not refuse me-you're always ignoring me.And I hate it so much because you never paid so much attention-'  
  
"I-I'm sorry but I have to leave," she said-interrupting his troubled self. She quickly approached Van who was currently fixing his tuxedo and left.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Is that how you quickly leave me here?  
  
How you instantly held his arm and ran away with him?  
  
I know you did not run away.But for me, you did.  
  
You ran away from my proposal.  
  
I just wanted marriage.  
  
Isn't that the best thing to do?  
  
If it isn't.  
  
Then what is it?  
  
Tell me.  
  
Oh, how I wish you could tell me what the hell is going on in our relationship!  
  
I want the old you back.  
  
What is happening?  
  
Is there something that I've done badly that hurt you so much?  
  
Or.  
  
You are just FALLING OUT of love with me, Hitomi?  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"I'm very happy for you," Van said, breaking the silence.  
  
His voice pierced into herself. She looked at him and was befuddled. "Why?" she asked. He shrugged and sighed. "Maybe, it's because Allen is there for you always and you've found your fate, your destiny. Isn't that the reason you live? That you need to be with him because you love him?"  
  
"Not actually.I can still change my mind. Right now, I don't know where this relationship of ours will go. Whether we'll break up or we'll be tied together as a married couple. I just don't know."  
  
"But how will you know?"  
  
She stopped and thought about his question. He was right. How will she know that Allen is not for her? Does something need to happen before realization comes into place? Does a bad event have to occur before she realizes that she never loved him as what she thought before? Suddenly the door opened and Millerna came in. She wore her nightshirt. She went to Van and embraced him tightly.  
  
"Let's sleep now, Van," she said. Van looked at her and nodded his head happily. He then turned to Hitomi.  
  
"Konbanwa. . ." he said. They stood up and left the room. Suddenly, Hitomi sobbed. She never felt so lonely before. Her eyes were lowered and tears came running down on her face.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
'My, imouto.  
  
I hope she didn't grieve for me when I left. She's too expressional of her childish feelings. Well, I just wish she were fine.'  
  
He opened his closed eyes and looked at the sleeping woman in front of him. Her blonde hair spread over her back-some were covering her face half-lit by the moon's light. She looked like an angel. Her lips were pink and her rosy cheeks were distinct. He lifted his hand and held her cheek gently so as not to wake her up. Her skin was warm under his fingers and the sensation eased the aching muscles of his callused hand. He moved his hand across her face and brushed it tenderly. He accidentally touched her delicate lips and felt worried that he might destroy the sound sleep of the lady-but.nothing happened luckily. She was asleep and didn't even move a bit. He sighed deeply and was grateful for that. He didn't want to interrupt the lady's dreams. Yes, dreams. But he once interrupted them before. More of his fault than his grandfather's. Suddenly, he brought his face closer to hers and gazed at her features. His eyes were midnight blue and sadness filled his lips that he began to frown. She was his friend-even before, when they were still children-when they were having the dreams of their lives achieved. His grandpa thought that they were perfectly meant for each other so he arranged their marriage immediately. They had to be engaged that early. But it wasn't their choice, besides she loved another man. And she desired for him. But his grandfather stopped her and commanded his cohorts to salvage her loved man instead. Her life was torn down completely when she knew what happened and it made a vast void in her heart. She never knew the true killer because no one dared to speak. That was how powerful his grandfather was. And that power he contained was just too much that he can kill anyone to attain what he sought after. And then when Van came, she was able to build her dreams again. She was able to cope with her situation and it is all because of him. She fell in love with him- body and soul. Unfortunately, he had no special feelings for her and he will still be her childhood best friend. His heart needed a woman who will love him because he is himself-not because he is like her past man. He understood her somehow. And he didn't want to hurt her so he tried everything to fall in love with her. But it was useless. It's true, he wanted to protect her from other people who'll hurt her. But his feelings for her won't ever go beyond that.  
  
'Gomenasai.'  
  
He closed his eyes and pressed his lips on hers. His felt warm and satisfied. But he was trembling. He felt that she melted in his arms. She became fragile and weak because of his kiss. But he could not caress her body. It was so young, gentle and tender. He didn't want to hurt her. He slowly removed his lips and looked at her once again. Sadness. that was the feeling his lips expressed. He noticed the flood of tears on her face. She was disappointed at what she felt. The thing that she wanted to feel wasn't there. Instead there were apology, sadness and guilt that mingled between them. 'Millerna, I'm very sorry,' his thought abated and he was able to sleep.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"Ohayou, Hitomi," Van greeted as he assisted Millerna as she sat down. Hitomi smiled sweetly then continued to eat her breakfast. Van sat beside her and broke a piece of her bread. He gingerly ate the piece and was very careful about his manners.  
  
'He's so refined. But how did he become so gentle?' she thought as she observed his graceful acts. He got a napkin and carefully wiped his mouth then folded it and placed beside hi plate.  
  
"Arigato for the food," he said. He looked at Millerna and grinned widely. "I'll just take a shower. Please wait for me," he told her. She nodded her head. He stood up and left them.  
  
"Millerna kept quiet as she drank her tea. She didn't speak to her as much as possible. But suddenly, Hitomi opened up a conversation that she might drop too.  
  
"How long will you stay here?" she asked her. She shrugged and sighed. "I have to wait until Van decides to marry me. We haven't discussed that matter yet. And right now, I'm still waiting." She replied. "Umm.do you think I have a chance? I mean-will he ever marry me?"  
  
Hitomi was shocked at what she said. She has never met a girl like her before. She was very open to her feelings. 'Maybe, she's not that flirtatious after all. I can befriend her and help her to Van.' She smiled sweetly-her light brown eyes shone.  
  
"Of course, Van likes a simple woman like you. But don't flirt so much with him. You have to be humble in whatever you do. Remember, simplicity is beauty," she sophisticatedly answered. Millerna chuckled at what she has just said. Her face was blushing with laughter.  
  
"You're a good adviser, Hitomi. Thanks!" she said. Hitomi laughed too and they began to like each other. "You know what? I can help you to Allen and you can help me to Van. Isn't it great?!" she said. Hitomi nodded in response. And they began to laugh again. Suddenly, Van came. He wore a formal coat and a blue necktie. He held two suitcases.  
  
"Let's go now, Millerna," he said. She stood up and went to him. Then she waved good bye to Hitomi.  
  
"Ja ne!" she said. Hitomi nodded her head and grinned widely. Then they went away. 'Why is he wearing formal clothes? I thought he's just a waiter?' she thought.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
Author's Notes: This work is by me of course. But the characters are originally made by Shoji Kawamori(is he?) Well, I'm sorry I have to put the disclaimer at the middle part of this story. Again, please read, review and enjoy. For any comments, corrections or violent reactions or even requests, you can e-mail me at kaymordeno@yahoo.com because I really want this fic to be great. If you have any cool ideas in your mind that can help me in finishing this story, please do tell me! Well, on with the story. . .  
  
He opened the shoji and went inside his office. Millerna followed him and put his suitcases beside his table. He sat down on the upholstered chair and turned on his laptop.  
  
Suddenly, she interrupted him.  
  
"Won't you tell her the truth?" she asked. He stopped checking some files and faced her. "No, Millerna. I don't want her feelings towards me change. She'd be upset if I tell her. Besides, she's contented to live with a lie. She has never known truths of mysteries. And I want to be one of the mystery in her life," he said calmly. He sighed exhaustingly and put on his eyeglasses. His midnight blue eyes shone as he quietly sat on his chair. A feeling of anxiety sailed in his magnificent eyes.  
  
'Those eyes do not belong to my Van. They belong to the Van that left me before,' she thought sadly. Suddenly, he looked at her and she began to blush. She lowered her head as she flushed more. 'Oh, God! Take off his eyes on me.'  
  
His eyes were so charming. They seem to look in other's soul as he looks at those people. It seems to reveal secrets that the person in front of him was hiding. That's why she took off her own away from his. She's afraid he might to know the truth. The truth that she was truly, madly and deeply in love with him and that she did not want to lose him.  
  
"Millerna, daijobou de gozaru ka?" he asked. She was startled at what she heard. She lifted her head and saw the worried look on his face. She began to smile sweetly. "Hai. Well, I need to go. I will meet you later," she said as she stood up. He nodded his head. Then she came closer to him and pressed a kiss on his lips. She held his face and tasted his breath. Then she let go of hers to gasp for air. "Ja," she said. She went to door and went away.  
  
Van continued his work again. He surfed the net and checked his e-mail. There was a letter for him. He opened it as he clicked the mouse and realized it was from his imouto, Merle. He grinned widely and was very happy at what he just received.  
  
'Domo arigato gozaimasu, imouto. I appreciated it so much,' he thought happily.  
  
But,  
  
He didn't know.  
  
That that letter.  
  
Would change.  
  
His life.  
  
Forever.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
"S-stop!" she cried. "Okay? You don't understand me. I said I can't take this relationship anymore. You're getting farther from me. I hate this kind of feeling-of being neglected because of stupid reasons. And you'd just come up here and kiss me?! Do you think I can forgive you? I've suffered enough from what you have done! Don't be so insensitive! You know what you've been doing and I personally just don't like it!"  
  
Tears fell out of her eyes. Her brown iris got smaller as the feeling of exploitation pounded her heart. She was very angry with him. Her patience was gone and she couldn't stand it any longer.  
  
"I trusted you," she spoke as she began to calm down. "But did you trust me?! No! Instead you didn't wait. You haven't waited. You haven't stopped yourself. You know I don't have the ability to cheat on people. You should've at least trusted me, for God's sake!"  
  
"Let me explain." he broke in. Suddenly, she slapped him. Her hand was trembling-afraid that she was wrong.  
  
"No! Tell me-can you explain what happened between you and that prostitute?! I saw you both. You had sex! And I was there the whole time. You cheated on me and you never told me about it. Now, you are here asking me to have marriage with you?! Allen, I've had enough of you! You've been lying to me the whole time and still you haven't stopped. Now, I'm beginning to realize that this marriage of yours is a big perfect lie!" She burst crying. She paused every time she breathed in. It was too painful for her. Her heart was torn apart because of the intense feelings she was experiencing. Memories shook her mind every time she'd look at his face. But anger blocked her brain. She knew it was a torture to let him go. But she had no other choice. 'It's either I break up with him or I get tied up with him as his stupid wife.No, I couldn't choose being his wife. Dammit, he lied. He had lied. What else could he do when we're married?!' He tried to touch her face. But she violently pushed him.  
  
"I've had enough of this.I don't want to suffer anymore." She spoke. "I hate you, Allen!!!" She slapped him once again making it sure that she'll release all her anger. But there were still forgiveness and love standing by-waiting for her to speak it out.  
  
Silence. . .  
  
His eyes widened in shock. His cheek started to ache and felt a stream of blood rushing down from it. He turned his head to her and looked at her earth brown eyes.  
  
"Have. . .have I neglected you so much?  
  
I loved you with all my heart and soul.  
  
But what's the reason behind your complaints and intense feelings about me?  
  
You were never open to me not that I really wanted you to be.  
  
You've been always secretive of your feelings mostly the pains you feel inside.  
  
You don't want to share it with me.  
  
Is this the reason we built a relationship?  
  
To hide the pains and sufferings inside and not share it with the other?" he said. She didn't look at him. Fear overcame her feelings.  
  
"I've always asked you if you love me, Hitomi. But, God, did you answer? Oh wel-you said 'maybe'. But is that enough for me to hear your answer? I never knew that there was wrong about what I showed you. But.but where did you get all the things you've said?" he spoke. Suddenly, she slapped him once, releasing all her anger. She looked down on him with crimson eyes0eyes that do not belong to her true self.  
  
"I got them from you STUPID ASS! DAMMIT, I'LL LET YOU GO! YOU'RE FREE NOW. IN FACT WHY DON'T YOU GO BACK TO THAT WOMAN WHO DESTROYED ME?! SHE'D SURELY FILL UP THE VOID IN YOUR SORRY ASS!!!" she cursed him. She went away angrily as if a storm destroyed the room. He sat there silently-stupefied at what she did to him. He never thought he had hurt her so much to the point that she'll manifest her anger by mental and physical torture-things he couldn't stand. 'So.she had known what I've done. I thought she hadn't seen me that night. I also thought that I've hid that secret so well. But obviously, I was wrong again.' Tears rushed on his face and blood flowed on his cheek. He could feel the sensation burying deeper and melting his skin. He tried to block his memories but her face kept on flashing in his mind. Those crimson eyes gazed at him as if he was the most evil person in the world. He never knew her true self. He never knew the true girl behind the one he loved so dearly.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
The words stung him. They were like a poison to his soul. They kept on repeating and jabbing his face. He didn't want that to happen. He was so sorry for himself, for her whom he loved so mush. He was about to go back and see her but now he had no reason. She died.  
  
DEAR VAN,  
  
I HOPE YOU'RE IN GOOD HEALTH. WE MISS YOU SO MUCH. BUT DON'T SMILE YET. BECAUSE I'VE GOTTA TELL YOU THAT-  
  
MOTHER'S GONE. SHE DIED LAST SATURDAY. GOMENASAI. I TRIED TO CALL YOU BUT I FORGOT YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND GRANPA ADVISED ME TO KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT. BUT YOU KNOW I CAN'T DO THAT-SO I E-MAILED. SORRY, BRO. I THINK THERE'S NO MORE REASON TO GO BACK HERE. YOU SHOULD STAY THERE AND MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE. GOMEN.  
  
YOUR IMOUTO, MERLE  
  
P.S. BETTER NOT SEND ME A REPLY. GRANDPA WOULD SURELY KNOW.  
  
Behind his ocean blue eyes were the faintest stream of tears. 'I was wrong to leave you. Mother, sorry.'  
  
Flashback:  
  
"Why do you have to leave? Are you not contented?" she asked. Her nose was pink and her sweet voice turned hoarse. He lifted his hand and wiped the tears in her amber haze eyes. She was so gentle and too expressive of her feelings. "Mother, I'm contented. I just want to find my destiny, my fate. I want to live life in my own. Don't worry. If I'd be able to meet my fate, I'll come back and visit you," he said. He tried to explain to her. But her mother's love for her child made her not able to understand. She burst crying in his soft but firm with love embrace.  
  
"But what if.you won't meet your fate? Will you still come back?" she asked as she looked at her son. Her eyes were red and tears still welled up. He wiped them by his thumb and smiled sweetly. "I have one word, mother. I don't want you to be anxious because of me. I'll come back. Promise," he said.  
  
End of FB:  
  
'I'm so stupid to live away from you! I haven't even said good bye to you,' he thought as he buried his face on his cold trembling hands. It was too painful for him. It was all his fault. If he hadn't left, maybe she would have still lived by now. It was all his fault. 'I-I am so sorry, mother.' He mused.  
  
Suddenly, the door opened.  
  
"Mr. Fanell, Ms. Millerna is. . ." the woman stopped as she saw him crying on his table. She was shocked. She was about to come closer to him when she decided to call Millerna. After a moment, she dashed in and comforted him. She sat beside him and laid his body on her chest. She stroked his hair gently. "What happened, Van? Huh?" she asked. He continued crying. Tears rushed out. He couldn't speak. "Van, tell me what happened." She asked again. This time, he looked up at her, eyes filled with sorrow and tears.  
  
"You won't understand. You won't feel what-I'm.feeling right now. It's painful here," he said as he clenched his fist and put it on his chest. She was shocked at what he said. She let go of him as he sat up and wiped his tears. "You'll never understand my situation!" he cried as he left.  
  
"Van!" she shouted. But he left.  
  
~*~*~*  
  
He went inside his car and locked himself inside. He cried and cried. He got his car key inside his pocket and started the engine. Suddenly, heavy rain poured from the sky and thunder and lightning rolled. The road was slippery and it was perilous to continue but he still drove. He wanted to release all his anger and tremendous sorrow inside. If he can't release it by tears, he'll just drive through this bad weather and manifest his sadness. 'I don't care.whether I'll die.or not. Besides, she's gone. Whom do I have to live for? No one!'  
  
"Why did you leave me? Is it because I never fulfilled my promise to you?" he asked himself. He drove faster. Tears blurred his vision besides of the heavy rain banging loudly on his car. It was dark and he can't see clearly, until a ten-wheeler truck came skidding. He hadn't seen it so.  
  
"NOOOOO!!!!" he cried. His car bumped the truck and was thrown into the air and as soon as it landed on the ground, skidded. The truck blew up while the car caught flames and was burned.  
  
TBC.  
  
Author: WAHAHAHA!!!I'M EVIL. *grins* Gawsh, that was a very long chapter. My fingers are so tired. Well, hope you enjoyed it and please review. By the way, for the Allen fans out there, I'm sorry I have to make him that evil. Because the truth is, I really, really hate him! ^__^ Don't hurt me. And sorry too for the Van Fanell fans out there because I had to make him cry that much. Well, so much for these things. Ja, minna-san!!! 


	5. Sorrow

A/n: Well, well, well. it's been three months guyz.I haven't updated this story much because of schoolwork and receiving NO REVIEWS. . . That's all I want for this chapter and I guess you could give me a nice review, ne? By the way, I want to thank ELOQUENT-LOTUS for.*sobs* giving me a very- inspirational review. You urged me to continue this stupid story. Thanks! Sana reviewhin mo pa rin ito kahit corny. Un lang naman ang nakakaencourage sakin. Enywayz, I know, you, guys, are still reading this even though you do not even care to leave me a nice review. But you could always e-mail me at kaymordeno@yahoo.com. So, on with the story!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own this anime thingy. OK?  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Sorrow  
  
@~~~~~  
  
Ring! Ring! Ring!  
  
"Moshi, moshi," Millerna greeted as she answered the phone. Her eyes were tired and different thoughts troubled her much at that moment- and it's because of Van. He was so weird and she just didn't understand him. 'What the damned hell happened to him?'  
  
She held the phone tightly as she listened. Suddenly, tears welled up in her eyes as they widened in shock.  
  
"Mr. Van Fanell had an accident. His car collided with a truck. Both vehicles were caught by fire. He had no burnt wounds but he had very deep and severe wounds. Ms. Millerna, he's in a very critical condition," the nurse spoke.  
  
Tears rushed out from Millerna's eyes as she continued to listen to the nurse's voice. She wanted to hang up now. She just wanted to. She couldn't take anymore. 'This is just a dream. . .' She wanted to wake up and make herself realize that what the nurse was saying was just a mere joke- a lie, a perfect lie. "You're lying!" she cried. "He's not going to die. MY FIANCE' ISN'T GOING TO DIE, DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!" she shouted hysterically.  
  
"But, Ms. Millerna, sadly, HE MIGHT DIE. This is the truth- and we are informing you of it. I know what you are feeling right now and I'm so sorry for what happened. But if he won't fight it.," the nurse stopped.  
  
"W-what?" Millerna said.  
  
"What?!!!"  
  
"He'll surely die. I'm sorry but I have to go now. You just have to go to the hospital. Jan e," she said. The nurse hung up and the line was cut. Millerna put the phone down and was disappointed. She cried so hard and she didn't know what to do. Suddenly, she remembered something. She got the phone and dialed the numbers. "Hello? Hitomi. . .this is- Millerna," she said as she stopped herself from crying.  
  
"Oh, Millerna. Why are you crying?" Hitomi asked on the other line.  
  
"You. . .n-need to go w/ me to the hospital. V-van had an accident. . .and h-he's in critical condition- I don't know. . .w-what to do, Hitomi. P- please, help me." she began to cry again. Hitomi wasn't able to speak. She was shocked at what happened. She could only hear her own breath and Millerna's crying voice.  
  
'She is in pain. Just like me. But this is too much for her.'  
  
She just held the phone and didn't speak.  
  
"Hitomi. . .please. Go," she asked again.  
  
"OK. I'll meet you there," she replied. They hung up on each other and went away.  
  
@~~~~~  
  
They soon arrived at the hospital and went immediately to the E.R.  
  
"Nurse, how's the patient?" Hitomi asked.  
  
The nurse shook her head. "He's not recovering and his condition is getting worse," she said.  
  
"But you need to save him!!!" Millerna suddenly shouted as she cried. "He's my fiancé. Can't you understand?! I can't live without him."  
  
Hitomi and the nurse got shocked. Tears flowed out of her eyes as she looked at them desperately. "I'm very sorry, Millerna. But if he won't fight it, he'll eventually die. We're trying our very best to save someone here...but if he doesn't want to live anymore- he'll give up that easily," the nurse explained. Then she went inside when the doctor called her.  
  
Millerna wailed as she embraced Hitomi- her friend. They sat on a bench. She laid her head on her chest and cried painfully.  
  
"He's going to be fine, Millerna. He wouldn't want to leave you," Hitomi comforted her. But she just cried harder.  
  
"He is not going to make it. . ." she said.  
  
@~~~~~  
  
I face against my death  
  
Holding my head up  
  
And eyeing him  
  
I fight him with my courage  
  
With all my strength  
  
I don't care the pain it caused me  
  
I need to live  
  
Not to die  
  
Not to give up  
  
If I die,  
  
I won't see my loved one's again  
  
Especially. . .  
  
Hitomi. . .  
  
That I can't take  
  
I've lost mother  
  
I can't lose Hitomi now  
  
Just because I'm going to die  
  
I want live  
  
Help me  
  
I want to win against death. . .  
  
@~~~~~  
  
"Doctor, he's not responding."  
  
"Try again. We need to save him."  
  
"Okay, charging. . ."  
  
"250. . .300. . .350. . , NOW!"  
  
"Okay, his heartbeat is- Damn no! Not again.Try it, repeat it!"  
  
"Charging. . .250. . .300. . .350. . .400.., now!"  
  
"Heartbeat slowed more, breathing is abnormal. . .Doctor, he's not really responding."  
  
"If he doesn't make it for the last two attempts, after four minutes, he'll die. . ."  
  
"Okay, repeat it. 250. . .300. . .350. . .400.., now!"  
  
"Heartbeat slowed more, he's catching his breath. Condition is fatal."  
  
Silence.  
  
The nurses and the doctors looked at their patient and almost lost hope. They had made five attempts, but he didn't respond.  
  
"Looks like we're going to lose a patient now."  
  
"I'm sorry. . .now, let's do it for the last time."  
  
"Charging. . .250. . .300. . .350. . .400. . .450. . , now!"  
  
"Stay it on longer!"  
  
"Stop. . .wait. . ."  
  
The doctors and nurses looked at his condition. He was regaining his heartbeat.  
  
"Condition is climbing up to normal level. Heartbeat regaining. Breathing is fine."  
  
After some moments. . .  
  
"We made it, people! We saved him."  
  
The medics soon smiled. They all congratulated each other.  
  
"I thought, we'll lose him. But then, God has been kind to us once again."  
  
@~~~~~  
  
Her tears rolled down on her cheeks as she mourned beside her. She kept on worrying about him- about his condition. Two days have passed yet there wasn't any news about him. It hurt her so much and all she could do was cry beside Hitomi. Though it never really made her feel better, she kept on doing it.  
  
"He'll be fine, Millerna. Trust me. . ." Hitomi would always tell her. But it would just make her worry more. Everything was so hard for her and nothing would make things easy unless, he was saved from his worsening condition.  
  
"Hitomi. . ."  
  
Hitomi looked down on her and saw her tear-stricken red eyes. She could barely make out her feelings just by looking at her face.  
  
"Nani?"  
  
She sighed then sat up straight.  
  
"I'm tired-"  
  
Millerna stood up then wiped her tears.  
  
"I'm exhausted. I have no more tears to shed for Van. This is enough. . ."  
  
Hitomi was stupefied at what she has just said. She tried to stare at her but she could see nothing but a vast void and nothing beyond that.  
  
"W-what're you saying?"  
  
She exhaled. Her chest hurt as the air rushed out from her mouth and nose.  
  
"I can't keep on mourning for him . . . I've had enough. I know he won't-"  
"Ms. Millerna, he made it!" a nurse exclaimed happily as she came out of the room. They all looked at her.  
  
"Ms. Millerna," she told held her arms. "We saved him."  
  
Tears burst from her eyes as she heard the nurse's words. 'I thought. . .I thought- Van will d-die! Oh, my God! Thank y-you. . .' she thought happily. She embraced Hitomi as she cried. "Hitomi, he's a-alive!" she shouted as she hugged her. Hitomi embraced her too as she smiled sadly.  
  
'I'm glad. Now, you're complete again. But for me, my world has stopped moving since I broke up with Allen. My dreams crushed and I feel lifeless right at this moment.'  
  
@~~~~~  
  
"I heard that Van Venera had an ccident and right now, Hitomi is in the hospital with Ms. Millerna," Ucari spoke as she looked at Allen coldly. She was angry with him though she had to be kind to him since he was her boss. Hitomi had told her all the events and the things that caused their relationship to be destroyed. And that made her temper to rise higher.  
  
"Yeah. But I don't care. He's nobody. Just a waiter and an accidental roommate of my ex- " he replied abruptly with that tone in his low voice.  
  
"But he's a kind man and a good friend of YOUR EX-" Ucari sarcastically said as she continued scanning the files she's holding.  
  
"Still, I don't care whether he's a stupid waiter in a cheap restaurant or a half-angel moron friend of my EXGIRLFRIEND," he exclaimed. His tone of voice rose with such anger and insult. But it was hurt that made his voice cold and sad.  
  
Finally, Ucari stood and confronted him. "Why are you so selfish?! The man is innocent and his life is in danger. Don't you even care?!" she cried.  
  
He didn't reply.  
  
Suddenly. . .  
  
"Why would I care? Do I know him? Besides, he's not even my friend. And maybe, we don't know, he'll be the future boyfriend of Hitomi. So why would I pity a man that will steal the heart of my woman?!" he cried angrily.  
  
Surprisingly, Ucari's hand landed on his cheek and slapped him hard right there. "Hitomi's not your woman anymore. And I don't care if Van will be her next boyfriend. But at least I know that she is in GOOD HANDS- a man with a faithful heart. And I'm afraid you're not like that!" She grabbed her bag and threw the files onto him. She then walked out of the door angrily and slammed the door on his face.  
  
Allen cupped his face then cursed himself under his breath.  
  
@~~~~~  
  
She held his hand and whispered sweet words to his ear. Tears fell slowly on her cheeks as she looked at him.  
  
"I love you, Van. . .and I'm happy that you're back," she spoke.  
  
The door opened and Hitomi came in. she went to her. "You rest first, Millerna. I'll just look after Van," she said. Millerna nodded her head then stood up. She went outside and left them there.  
  
Hitomi sat on the chair beside the bed. She looked at Van's face and noticed its pale color.  
  
"Van. . .wake up," she said softly. She held his hand and brushed his bangs away from his tightly closed eyes. "Millerna is so worried for you. And she'll be glad if you'll wake up and just look at her, won't she?" she spoke. Suddenly, his fingers moved. She felt it against her skin and saw the movement of his eyes.  
  
"Van?" she called. She held his face then brushed her fingers on his cheeks.  
  
Soon he opened his eyes and looked at the woman in front of him. His heart skipped a beat and his lips curved into a smile.  
  
"Hi. . .to- mi," he said happily. She was surprised to see him awake. She smiled then held his cheek.  
  
"Van, I'm glad you're awake," she said.  
  
He cheerfully smiled as he looked at her. "I- I. . .w-was dreaming of you- earlier. I dreamt that I. . .I was going to lose you then. . .I just heard your voice," he told her. She smiled as she held his face.  
  
"I'll call Millerna," she said as she stood up but suddenly, Van grabbed her hand and pulled her down.  
  
She was shocked.  
  
"D-don't. . ." he whispered.  
  
"Van?"  
  
"No, don't call her," he said. She slowly removed his hand on hers and she looked at him sadly.  
  
"Don't hurt her, Van. I beg you. She loves you very much. It's a mistake to let her go," she spoke.  
  
He closed his eyes tightly as he breathed in deeply.  
  
"But you know I tried. . .and I can't- In fact, she is not loving me. She is loving her dead fiancé," he explained sadly.  
  
Hitomi held his hand then smiled before him. She touched his cheek and sighed.  
  
"Well then, let her love you."  
  
Van opened his eyes and gazed into her deep brown eyes.  
  
"Let me love you, too, Hitomi. . ."  
  
@~~~~~  
  
My heart suffering from pain  
  
It is wounded fatally from a past  
  
Love that I thought won't end  
  
And now I'm hurting  
  
But then you came  
  
Yet someone is loving you-  
  
I'm so confused  
  
I just can't think of what'll I do  
  
If I'll love you,  
  
She'll be hurt and pained  
  
And I know how it feels to be pained  
  
And I know how it feels to be wounded  
  
But if I won't love you  
  
I know in my heart that I'll regret it forever. . .  
  
@~~~~~  
  
"Ohayou gozaimasu, Hitomi!" Millerna greeted happily. She hopped towards her with that certain sparkle in her eyes. But as she reached her, she quickly noticed her sadness in her brown eyes. She wondered why as she looked at her troubled face.  
  
"Hitomi? Are you alright?" she asked as she knelt down infront of her. Hitomi looked at her slowly then cupped her face with both hands.  
  
"V-van's awake, Millerna."  
  
"I know- I visited him earlier. He was fine."  
  
"Why did you leave him there?"  
  
"He said he wanted to rest. Well, why do you ask?"  
  
She removed her hands from her face and stared at her. "It's just that- I'm concerned."  
  
Millerna didn't understand her. She just stood and went to the door. "I'll go now, Hitomi. You need to rest for a while," she spoke. She opened the door then left.  
  
@~~~~~  
  
He fell in a deep trance. His eyes were closed and his imagination floated in his dreams. Though they weren't even true, he felt alive in that world and so happy.  
  
A garden was there and a road was in the middle. At the end of the path was a light that streaked out and spread everywhere. He stood in front of everything and watched the serenity floating in the air. He took a step forward and as soon as his foot touched the ground, images appeared beside him.  
  
TBC...  
  
A/n: Please review, everyone! And thanks a lot for appreciating this stupid story of mine. Hope you'll like it! ^__^ 


End file.
